Stormy Daniels shares XXX-rated details of her alleged affair with Trump in new book

Stormy Daniels shares XXX-rated details of her alleged affair with Trump in new book
Why Toad from Mario Kart is in the news
Share Share Why Nintendos Toad is in the news, and why he doesnt deserve this tweet share Reddit Pocket Flipboard Email What does Toad look like to you? Nintendo If you, like many Americans who use social media, woke up this morning wondering why Toad — the beloved Nintendo character and Mushroom Kingdom institution — was trending, our advice is to let yourself believe its because Nintendo of America is doing another Toad Takeover promotion and pay it no more mind. Just trust us.

However, if you already have an inkling of why Toad is suddenly trending and you need a little more context, well, were sorry, but were here for you.

Video: Stormy Daniels shares details of alleged affair with Trump in new book

This story begins with the Guardian publishing excerpts from porn actress and director Stormy Danielss forthcoming tell-all book, Full Disclosure, about her alleged past affair with Donald Trump. The book apparently contains a graphic description of a sexual encounter with Trump, including a detailed description of the presidents penis.

She's one of the few characters who's appeared in every iteration of Mario Kart, and many of the other mainstays either don't have similar driver characteristics to Toad, or have disqualifying mustaches. Her Mario Kart Wiki page notes that her "performance is notably on par with Toad." That's more than enough empirical evidence from a trusted source to make the switch. Another worthy reason: In Super Smash Bros, Peach has long been using Toad as a shield/attack counter, so clearly she realized a while ago that he's expendable. That foresight deserves to be rewarded.

It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool, Daniels writes. I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart.

Toad has long been an ideal selection in Mario Kart, since he's both adorable and speedy as hell. Do not despair, though. We've compiled a brief collection of suitable replacement characters to choose from if the phallic imagery Toad now inspires has you questioning your Mario Kart-playing experience/entire childhood. (To be clear, this isn't a boycott of Toad. It's an exercise in self care.)

Though the book also contains mentions of Danielss impression that Trump never wanted to be president, and of her $130,000 hush agreement, its the description of Trumps genitalia that has dominated the discussion around the excerpts.

Tuesday began like any other in the Mushroom Kingdom: With Princess Peach presiding over her loyal subjects, and a collection of troublemakers wreaking havoc. But for once, it's not Bowser drawing up the negative headlines that usually accompany his hijinks in the Mario universe, because the formerly innocent Toad was compared to the the President of the United States' dick by Stormy Daniels.

Nintendo tweet goes viral after Trumps ***** gets compared to Toad

For those of you who have never touched a Nintendo console in your life, Toad is indeed a little mushroom man, whose mushroom cap (ugh) was confirmed to be part of his head and not just a hat by Super Mario Odyssey producer Yoshiaki Koizumi earlier this year.

So, for the rest of you out there who don’t want to know about the trending Mario Kart topic, it’s best that you simply just avoid social media today. You should probably avoid keywords like toadstool, toad, or even Mario Kart. Seriously, if you want to do anything remotely close to preserving your childhood, you should just avoid it altogether, put down the socials for the day, and dodge the topic at all costs. Please heed my warning and just don’t. #JustSaying

And while hes a bit gormless, Toad doesnt deserve to be a part of this discourse: He is a perfectly fine playable character in Mario Kart, he runs Mario Party, and he generally tries to help out in every other Mario franchise game, going all the way back to 1985s Super Mario Bros.

Personal character aside, though, the Toad news has prompted some upset from people who have never wanted to imagine the subject of Danielss comparison (as well as some cursory speculation that Twitter icon dril may truly be some kind of prophet).

I still find it odd when things in pop-culture or politics cross over into the gaming world. I often don’t think about the casual players out there, people that aren’t diehard fans of games yet still known the who’s who of gaming culture. This is especially the case when it involves people like the US president or any other world leaders out there.

Video: Stormy Daniels memoir being described as salacious

Thinking about how Toad is just the purest, cutest videogame character and how nothing could sully his image. Now to take a big gulp of coffee and check twitter

Doing a quick couple of searches left me to stumble upon the image below. What was displaying on my computer screen was simply not registering with my brain. Did the wholesome company that I’ve grown to love really respond to the filth floating around the internet today? Was I seeing what I really thought I was seeing?

me before seeing why Toad is trending vs me after seeing why Toad is trending pic.twitter.com/8LsY05lfBG

Hey everyone! You might be wondering why the word Toad is trending. Its because everyone loves that classic Nintendo character!*grabs your face, looks you dead in the eye* There is no other reason. Do not look for a reason.

Andy Cohen was tapped to replace Kathy Griffin in her CNN New Years co-hosting gig, but the two also traded jabs in 2017. Cohen was Griffins boss at Bravo while her show “My Life on the D-List” was on the air, and shes appeared on his talk show twice, but in an interview he repeatedly pretended he didnt know her. Griffin called him “deeply misogynistic” in response. She later escalated the feud by saying Cohen twice offered her cocaine before appearing on the show (Cohen denied it) and by sharing a text from someone who had been in a relationship with Cohen. Cohen “is a small guy, not just in height,” the message read, taking a jab at his manhood. 

And now you know why Toad is trending. Dont say you werent warned. We leave you with this video of Toad screaming for two minutes straight:

Donald Trump once received a telephone call from Hillary Clinton when he was in a hotel room with Stormy Daniels, and the pair talked about our plan, Daniels reportedly alleges in her new tell-all book Full Disclosure.

According to British newspaper The Guardian, which has obtained a copy of the book ahead of its Oct. 2 release, Daniels writes that she was watching a Shark Week broadcast on TV with Trump in 2007 during their alleged affair when he took the call from Clinton.

So for once, Im going to say lets not take a closer look, Meyers said. Thats a joke about the news. You might be saying How dare you make a joke about a penis looking like a video game character. Thats the fucking news right now.

Full Disclosure by Stormy Daniels Has Few Bombshells, but Is Likely to Rattle the White House

Former porn star Daniels claims Trump and Clinton spoke about her race for the Democratic presidential nomination against then-Sen. Barack Obama, and Trump repeatedly mentioned our plan, but his attention kept going back to the sharks. It wasnt clear what the plan involved, however.

Mario Kart was trending on Twitter earlier in the day after former porn star Stormy Daniels likened President Donald Trumps penis to the mushroom character in Mario Kart in her upcoming tell-all book, Full Disclosure. 

Daniels, whose real name is Stephanie Clifford, alleges she and Trump had an affair in 2006. Trump denies the affair, but Daniels received $130,000 in hush money before the 2016 presidential election to stop her talking about it.

I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart, Daniels wrote, according to The Guardian.

Toad killed by a Storm, RIP 1985-2018

Daniels, in her book, describes Trumps penis as unusual and with a huge mushroom head, like a toadstool. She also says it was smaller than average but not freakishly small, according to The Guardian.

Referencing the memoir, Meyers was adamant that his head wasnt in the gutter, its the news which is in the gutter.

I lay there, annoyed that I was getting fucked by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart. It may have been the least impressive sex Id ever had, but clearly, he didnt share that opinion.

Stormy Daniels: Trumps Penis Looks Like Toad From Mario Kart

Daniels further alleges that Trump didnt want to be president, and offered to help her succeed on his reality television show, The Apprentice.

So we inquired no further because, obviously, there are no untoward icky reasons these things could be trending. Its probably just National Play Mario Kart as Toad Day, or maybe Ezra Miller put on his fancy Comic-Con outfit again. Certainly no need to click anything or look beyond the existence of a common trending topic and search term!

Least impressive sex Ive ever had: Stormy Daniels book reveals explicit details of Trump affair and his true thoughts on presidency

Well figure out a way to get you the challenges beforehand. And we can devise your technique, Daniels quotes him as saying, per The Guardian. He was going to have me cheat, and it was 100-percent his idea. 

You know what? I bet I know why its trending. Because hes just so CUTE. With his little non-suggestive appearance that could in no way be used to describe something otherwise unsavory, even horrifying. What a specific thing I just said! LOL IM SO RANDOM!


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